| What is my place in the universal
work?
We all have a role to fulfil, a work to accomplish,
a place which we alone can occupy.
But since this work is the expression, the outer
manifestation of the inmost depth of our being, we can become conscious
of its definitive form only when we become conscious of this depth
within ourselves.
This is what sometimes happens in cases of true
conversion.
The moment we perceive the transfiguring light
and give ourselves to it without reserve, we can suddenly and precisely
become aware of what we are made for, of the purpose of our existence
on earth.
But this enlightenment is exceptional. It is brought
about within us by a whole series of efforts and inner attitudes.
And one of the essential conditions if we want to achieve and maintain
within ourselves these attitudes, these soul-states, is to devote
part of our time each day to some impersonal action; every day,
we must do something useful for others.
Until we know the essential thing we are intended
to do, we must therefore find a temporary occupation which will
be the best possible manifestation of our present capacities and
our goodwill.
Then we shall give ourselves to this occupation
with conscientiousness and perseverance, knowing that it may well
be only a stage and that with the progress of our ideal and our
energies, we shall certainly one day be led to see more clearly
the work we must accomplish. To the extent that we lose the habit
of referring everything to ourselves and learn more and more to
give ourselves more completely, with greater love, to earth and
men, we shall see our horizons widen and our duties become more
numerous and clear.
We shall find that our action follows a general
line of progression determined by our own particular temperament.
Indeed, the successive occupations we shall hold
before we become conscious of the definitive form of our action
will always point in the same direction, be of the same type and
mode, which is the spontaneous expression of our character, our
nature, our own characteristic vibration.
The discovery of this tendency, this particular
orientation, should come about quite naturally; it is a matter of
taste and free choice, beyond all outer selfish considerations.
People are often blamed for choosing an action
for themselves which does not correspond to their abilities. There
is a slight confusion here.
Those who freely set out to accomplish their own
favourite work cannot, in my opinion, be on the wrong track; this
work must surely be the expression of their own particular tendency.
But their mistake lies in wanting to accomplish this work all at
once in its entirety, in its integrality, in depth and above all
on the surface, forgetting that the very conception of the work
is imperfect as they are imperfect and that to be wise, they should
add to the knowledge of what they wish to do the more immediate
and practical knowledge of what they are capable of doing at the
present moment.
By taking both these factors into account, they
can employ themselves with a minimum waste of time and energy.
But few people act with so much insight and wisdom.
And it very often happens that one who is seeking his way falls
into one of these two possible errors:
Either he takes his desires for realities, that
is, he overestimates his present strength and capacity and imagines
that he is capable of immediately assuming a place and a role which
he can honourably fulfil only after many years of methodical and
persevering effort.
Or he underestimates his latent powers and deliberately
confines himself, in spite of his deeper aspirations, to a task
which is far beneath his abilities and which will gradually extinguish
within him the light that could have shone for others.
It seems difficult at first to steer clear of these
pitfalls and find the balanced way, the middle way.
But we have a sure pointer to guide us.
Above all, whatever we undertake should not be
done for the purpose of self-assertion. If we are attached to fame
and glory, to the esteem of our peers, we are soon led to make concessions
to them; and if we seek any opportunity to admire ourselves, it
becomes easy to make ourselves out to be what we are not, and nothing
more obscures the ideal within us.
We should never tell ourselves, openly or indirectly,
“I want to be great, what vocation can I find for myself in order
to become great?”
On the contrary, we should tell ourselves, “There
must certainly be something I can do better than anyone else, since
each one of us is a special mode of manifestation of the divine
power which, in its essence, is one in all. However humble and modest
it may be, this is precisely the thing to which I should devote
myself, and in order to find it, I shall observe and analyse my
tastes, tendencies and preferences, and I shall do it without pride
or excessive humility, whatever others may think I shall do it just
as I breathe, just as the flower smells sweet, quite simply, quite
naturally, because I cannot do otherwise.”
As soon as we have abolished within us, even for
a moment, all egoistic desires, all personal and selfish aims, we
can surrender to this inner spontaneity, this deep inspiration which
will enable us to commune with the living and progressive forces
of the universe.
The conception of our work will inevitably grow
more perfect as we grow more perfect ourselves; and to realise this
growing perfection, no effort to exceed ourselves should be… neglected,
but the work we perform must become always more and more joyful
and spontaneous, like water welling from a pure spring.
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